He gives them hoof to chew. He gets paid cash and he makes a stash And the tax man's in the dark. He's invited to dine and gets brought wine, Oh, what a bloody lark. He needn't be good-lookin' He can smell like a two bit whore But all the women from far and near Will be begging him back for more. He can come into the house and have A cuppa tea and all And leave his muddy footprints On Axminster down the hall. He can tell the dirtiest jokes around A person's ever heard. But all the women from far and near Dote on his every word. He learns some things in the course of his job Like how to hide at a show, And who will pay him on the spot And who will want to owe. And how to ignore the telephone And now to make people wait. And how to make them smile at you Even when you're three hours late (or weeks). If you want to spread a bit of goss, There isn't anyone finer. He'll tell everyone along his route From here to South East China. They reckon farriers are just like cats (And need to be overhauled) They don't go out in the rain And they don't bloody well come when called! But what would we do without them? Our horses wouldn't cope. We'd have to instead do housework And we'd rather hang from a rope. So young man, be a farrier And make a hundred grand. And have the women from far and wide Eating out of your hand. Author unknown Blatantly copied from the A.F.B.A. Dec. Newsletter which was submitted by Ron Mansfield A.F.B.A. Qld branch This was printed in the Australian Carriage Driving Journal, Sept 2003 |
NITE 2004 The members of the Waimarino Riding Club would like to say Thank You and Congratulations to the clubs that came forward to run the NITE event 2004. Tauranga, Thames Valley, Franklin, Taupo, Otorohanga and Hamilton well done, take a bow. In our usual fashion almost all of our club attended and enjoyed the weekend. I think we had the biggest number of trucks there, need I say more. Good weather, good organisation good weekend, looking forward to the next one. Thank you Adrienne Maru (Sec) |
Tips for Movie Directors If you are on the point of directing a film set any time before about 1930, chances are you are going to have to have some horses in it. You might not, however, be a particularly horsey director, so here are a few things you should know about working with equine stars: 1. Horses are handy to get your hero from one place to another, but once he has arrived, and jumped off in a . hurry, they must be left to their own devices in the woods. They must not require untacking, feeding, taking a dump or tethering. They need only remain until the next frame, when they can conveniently disappear while the hero goes off for a snog. 2. If your plot involves showing your hero as a child, you will no doubt wish to have him showing off his precocious horsemanship skills. Do not forget, however, that when the film suddenly jumps thirty years to show him looking rather like Mel Gibson (in spite of having been a very unremarkable-looking brat) it is advisable to have him riding the same horse, whose sprightliness ought not to have decreased during the intervening three decades. 3. At some point, the hero might have to fall off - not because the horse's canter was a bit bumpy and he just lost a stirrup and wobbled over the side, but because icy ground sent the horse flying or an enemy swung on a rope from a tree and biffed him off, or a baddie cheated at jousting and will get his come-uppance later on. If this should happen, ensure that the hero's leg is broken before he remounts and gallops forty miles in the rain to do something heroic. (In some cases, it might be acceptable for it just to be dislocated). 4. If a female character falls off, it must be because the horse has spooked at a pheasant or similar (see No. 8 for details), or perhaps because the horse has simply moved. No matter what happens, she MUST NOT leave her bed for at least three months. Bleeding is probably advisable. N.B. If absolutely necessary, she could be bolted with - but when the horse eventually stops she ought really to faint (and then stay in bed for three months). 5. Tack should, of course, look a bit old-fashioned. Make sure, however, that parts of it date from about a hundred years after the period in which the film is set. If possible, it should differ between frames. 6. Never let a bad guy ride a grey horse. 7. Poo does not exist. Your hero need not push a wheelbarrow round the field every God-forsaken day of his life, as this could prolong the film's running time. 8. The very most important rule of all - there is no way in which this can be avoided. Whenever a horse is startled, IT MUST REAR UP. Not only this, but IT MUST NEIGH AT THE SAME TIME. Yes, I know you are thinking "But why would a horse expose the most vulnerable part of its body to potential predators, and why would it freely announce its presence to any additional predators lurking in the vicinity?", but if your hero's horse simply spooks or wheels round and legs it in the natural manner then he (the hero) will not be able to argue/ fall in the love/engage in mortal combat with the person who has done the startling. DO NOT forget this rule, no siree, not for any money. |
IN THIS ISSUE ROSIE'S RAMBLES...........................click here VET LEAFLETS...................................click here TIPS FOR MOVIE DIRECTORS........click here NITE RESULTS....................................click here THE FARRIER - POEM.......................click here HORSES ON NORFOLK ISLAND....click here |
ROSIES RAMBLES What a way to start the year! Well done North Island Clubs for gathering together and joint hosting NITE. Everything was done at such short notice, yet the weekend ran without hitch. This was the first NITE that I have been able to attend, (in the past I had work commitments that wrecked my social life) and what a positive atmosphere to come into. I had the privilege of judging a Cross Country fence, riding over each fence with each rider, I was exhausted by the time you had all finished..I was also envious of you all, wishing it was me. I managed to get photos of most riders going over the Joker during the Gamblers Stakes and the teams in their Quadrille costumes, so I have quite a good a visual record.. The photos are all on floppy disc, so may be able to Email a copy to your Club if you send me details. Arising from the situation of hosting NITE, there are a couple of questions that need to be talked about and opinions sought. For those who were at Taupo , you heard me ask them there, but Committee would like a response from all the North Island Clubs as it is YOUR event. Like to know your feelings, both for and against the following. ... 1. Should NITE be hosted at the same venue each year e.g.. Taupo Equestrian Centre or should it be the domain of the Host Club(s) to decide the venue? 2. How do Clubs feel about co-hosting NITE? Several Clubs could band together, each Club responsible for one area of NITE in which they feel the strongest-as was done this year. Or do we leave it to just one Club to do everything? Please send your feedback to Helen, 408 KioKio Station Road, RD4, Otorohanga. Happy riding and happy horses Rosemary. P.S. Just to finish, must thank my Farrier, Brian Biggs for his contribution to the newsletter.....the poetry. |
ROSIES RAMBLES What a way to start the year! Well done North Island Clubs for gathering together and joint hosting NITE. Everything was done at such short notice, yet the weekend ran without hitch. This was the first NITE that I have been able to attend, (in the past I had work commitments that wrecked my social life) and what a positive atmosphere to come into. I had the privilege of judging a Cross Country fence, riding over each fence with each rider, I was exhausted by the time you had all finished..I was also envious of you all, wishing it was me. I managed to get photos of most riders going over the Joker during the Gamblers Stakes and the teams in their Quadrille costumes, so I have quite a good a visual record.. The photos are all on floppy disc, so may be able to Email a copy to your Club if you send me details. Arising from the situation of hosting NITE, there are a couple of questions that need to be talked about and opinions sought. For those who were at Taupo , you heard me ask them there, but Committee would like a response from all the North Island Clubs as it is YOUR event. Like to know your feelings, both for and against the following. ... 1. Should NITE be hosted at the same venue each year e.g.. Taupo Equestrian Centre or should it be the domain of the Host Club(s) to decide the venue? 2. How do Clubs feel about co-hosting NITE? Several Clubs could band together, each Club responsible for one area of NITE in which they feel the strongest-as was done this year. Or do we leave it to just one Club to do everything? Please send your feedback to Helen, 408 KioKio Station Road, RD4, Otorohanga. Happy riding and happy horses Rosemary. P.S. Just to finish, must thank my Farrier, Brian Biggs for his contribution to the newsletter.....the poetry. |
IN THIS ISSUE ROSIE'S RAMBLES...........................click here VET LEAFLETS...................................click here TIPS FOR MOVIE DIRECTORS........click here NITE RESULTS....................................click here THE FARRIER - POEM.......................click here HORSES ON NORFOLK ISLAND....click here |
RIDERS ROUNDUP for DECEMBER 2003 JANUARY 2004 |
Tips for Movie Directors If you are on the point of directing a film set any time before about 1930, chances are you are going to have to have some horses in it. You might not, however, be a particularly horsey director, so here are a few things you should know about working with equine stars: 1. Horses are handy to get your hero from one place to another, but once he has arrived, and jumped off in a . hurry, they must be left to their own devices in the woods. They must not require untacking, feeding, taking a dump or tethering. They need only remain until the next frame, when they can conveniently disappear while the hero goes off for a snog. 2. If your plot involves showing your hero as a child, you will no doubt wish to have him showing off his precocious horsemanship skills. Do not forget, however, that when the film suddenly jumps thirty years to show him looking rather like Mel Gibson (in spite of having been a very unremarkable-looking brat) it is advisable to have him riding the same horse, whose sprightliness ought not to have decreased during the intervening three decades. 3. At some point, the hero might have to fall off - not because the horse's canter was a bit bumpy and he just lost a stirrup and wobbled over the side, but because icy ground sent the horse flying or an enemy swung on a rope from a tree and biffed him off, or a baddie cheated at jousting and will get his come-uppance later on. If this should happen, ensure that the hero's leg is broken before he remounts and gallops forty miles in the rain to do something heroic. (In some cases, it might be acceptable for it just to be dislocated). 4. If a female character falls off, it must be because the horse has spooked at a pheasant or similar (see No. 8 for details), or perhaps because the horse has simply moved. No matter what happens, she MUST NOT leave her bed for at least three months. Bleeding is probably advisable. N.B. If absolutely necessary, she could be bolted with - but when the horse eventually stops she ought really to faint (and then stay in bed for three months). 5. Tack should, of course, look a bit old-fashioned. Make sure, however, that parts of it date from about a hundred years after the period in which the film is set. If possible, it should differ between frames. 6. Never let a bad guy ride a grey horse. 7. Poo does not exist. Your hero need not push a wheelbarrow round the field every God-forsaken day of his life, as this could prolong the film's running time. 8. The very most important rule of all - there is no way in which this can be avoided. Whenever a horse is startled, IT MUST REAR UP. Not only this, but IT MUST NEIGH AT THE SAME TIME. Yes, I know you are thinking "But why would a horse expose the most vulnerable part of its body to potential predators, and why would it freely announce its presence to any additional predators lurking in the vicinity?", but if your hero's horse simply spooks or wheels round and legs it in the natural manner then he (the hero) will not be able to argue/ fall in the love/engage in mortal combat with the person who has done the startling. DO NOT forget this rule, no siree, not for any money. |
Enclosed with this newsletter are several leaflets, made available to us, by the New Zealand Veterinary Association. If your Club would like more copies, they should be available at your local vet clinic. NZRC would like to thank the EBNZVA for donating this reading material to us. |
OVERALL PLACINGS NORTH ISLAND TEAMS EVENT 2004 1st......Bad Boys 2nd.....Tegal Taranaki 3rd......Taupo Pussy Cats 4th..... Chequemate 5th......Grease Lightening 6th......Hamilton Knights 7th......Haggis Tossers 8th......Tequila Sheila's 9th......Tauranga Chicks 10th.....Highland Valley Charges 11th....Tango Dancers 12th....Sea Horses 13th....Schumachers 14th....Taranaki Toffs 15th.....Blues Brothers 16th.... Summer Fun |
O'Fee Cup. Overall winner 1st N/Plymouth & Districts - Bad Boys 2nd N/Plymouth & Districts -Tegel taranaki. 3rd Taupo - Pussy Cats 4th Thames Valley ARC - Chequemate. 5th Waimarino RC - Grease Lightning 6th 3rd H.O.RS.E. - Hamilton Knights Franklin A.RC. Cup, Riding club mount - Tegel Taranaki, New Plymouth. John Moore Cup, Quadrille Content - Bad Boys, New Plymouth. Spriggs Cup, Showjumping - Grease Lightning, Waimarino RC. Taukau ALL. & Double Divide Farm, Housekeeping & Uniform Award - Grease Lightning, Waimarino. Papakur4 Adult Riding Club Cup, Last but not least - Summerfun, Tauranga Adult RC. |
Phase 1 RIDING CLUB MOUNT 1 st N/Plymouth & Districts - Tegel Taranaki 2nd N/Plymouth & Districts - Bad Boys 3rd H.O.RS.E. - Hamilton Knights 4th Taupo - Pussy Cats Phase 2 QUADRILLE 1st N/Plymouth & Districts - Bad Boys 2nd N/Plymouth & Districts - Tegel taranaki. 3rd Fraknlin ARC - Tequilla Sheilas 4th Taukau ; Schumachers. |
Phase 3 TEAMS CROSS COUNTRY 1st Waimarino RC - Grease Lightning 2nd N/Plymouth & Districts - Bad Boys 3rd Otorohanga ARC - Haggis Tossers 4th Taupo - Pussy Cats Phase 4 TEAMS SHOWJUMPING, gamblers stakes 1st Waimarino RC - Grease Lightning 2nd Thames Valley RC - Chequemate 3rd Otorohanga ARC - Haggis Tossers 4th N/Plymouth & Districts - Bad Boys |
NITE 2004 The members of the Waimarino Riding Club would like to say Thank You and Congratulations to the clubs that came forward to run the NITE event 2004. Tauranga, Thames Valley, Franklin, Taupo, Otorohanga and Hamilton well done, take a bow. In our usual fashion almost all of our club attended and enjoyed the weekend. I think we had the biggest number of trucks there, need I say more. Good weather, good organisation good weekend, looking forward to the next one. Thank you Adrienne Maru (Sec) |
THE FARRIER Under the spreading Chestnut tree, The village Smithy stands. He has a smirk upon his face 'Cause the world's in the palm of his hands. He works for himself as hard as he likes And he gets terrific pay And women all over the country Hound him night and day. Of course he needs a lot of patience And a back as strong as steel And a degree in horsey bullshit And., as they say, a feel. He comes equipped with special tools - A hammer and knife to pare And a rasp for hitting up the ribs Whenever the owner's not there 'Cause a lot of the horses he gets to shoe Are no bloomin' piece of cake. They get no work and they're full of feed And mad as a bloody cut snake. They probably need a flogging But he doesn't have that choice. Their owners have spoilt them rotten But he can't even raise his voice. Well they want to go to pony club Or to hunt or go to a show And Neddy has pulled a shoe last night (He was only shod three months ago) So they grovel and beg the farrier to come And dote on his every wish. They make him cups of tea and even Cook his favourite dish. They will put up with an awful lot, These horsey female dills, 'Cause their precious equine babies Can't survive without his skills. So what a life a farrier has He's in such great demand. Everyone is after him So he has the upper hand. The guard dogs make him welcome. He's the only one they do Cause when he trims the horse's feet |
He gives them hoof to chew. He gets paid cash and he makes a stash And the tax man's in the dark. He's invited to dine and gets brought wine, Oh, what a bloody lark. He needn't be good-lookin' He can smell like a two bit whore But all the women from far and near Will be begging him back for more. He can come into the house and have A cuppa tea and all And leave his muddy footprints On Axminster down the hall. He can tell the dirtiest jokes around A person's ever heard. But all the women from far and near Dote on his every word. He learns some things in the course of his job Like how to hide at a show, And who will pay him on the spot And who will want to owe. And how to ignore the telephone And now to make people wait. And how to make them smile at you Even when you're three hours late (or weeks). If you want to spread a bit of goss, There isn't anyone finer. He'll tell everyone along his route From here to South East China. They reckon farriers are just like cats (And need to be overhauled) They don't go out in the rain And they don't bloody well come when called! But what would we do without them? Our horses wouldn't cope. We'd have to instead do housework And we'd rather hang from a rope. So young man, be a farrier And make a hundred grand. And have the women from far and wide Eating out of your hand. Author unknown Blatantly copied from the A.F.B.A. Dec. Newsletter which was submitted by Ron Mansfield A.F.B.A. Qld branch This was printed in the Australian Carriage Driving Journal, Sept 2003 |
SO YOU WANT TO BUY A HORSE/PONY Ever been there? Well consider this. There are about forty to choose from if they are available, but they are probably not. How about breeding one? There is a nice Welsh Cob available but you only own an old gelding! You could look further afield for one but this is about three days sailing away, there is no horse air transport. Yes you are on Norfolk Island, which is north of New Zealand and east of Australia. This puts the cost up significantly. How are you going to choose your horse? Fly to New Zealand, the preferred option in this case rather than Australia, to choose it, or ask someone to act on your behalf? Having purchased your horse it has to be shipped to Norfolk Island, approximately three days travel, then craned onto a lighter from the anchored ship to the jetty and craned off again. Needless to say you have no control over the weather and a rough passage or enforced lengthy anchorage due to rough seas and your horse may be suffering. This happened to an imported Clydesdale a few years ago and he died a few days later, in spite of veterinary attention. And what is the cost of shipping? Only a mere $5,500. Have you been keeping tally, it will make your favourite nag seem very cheap. Norfolk Island is a lovely place but has distinct drawbacks if you are a keen horseman, especially a competitive rider. Heather and I spent a week there in July and escaped a little of the winter and I was invited along to Pony Club as a guest Instructor. It is a small branch, not much bigger than Ohakune, with a great range of rider abilities, and horses and ponies. The Island population is about 1800 people so the numbers are on par with our area. The rally was very informal and I instructed the younger riders who would all have been capable of sitting `D' Certificate but little more. They were very enthusiastic and listened attentively. I introduced the Shopping Game, which they loved and one of the senior riders has plans to adopt it to Norfolk Island conditions. Qualified Instructors are non existent and certificates are not an option. They have rallies about once a fortnight all year round, with numbers increasing in the holidays as the boarding school students come home from Australia. They have one "show' a year, run by the club but I am uncertain if it is a gymkhana or an ODE. About half of the members ride to Pony Club and some are floated. Mum sometimes rides the pony out. The day I was due to instruct there was a funeral on the Island, so as usual all local activities were cancelled, and the rally was held four days later. Much of the grass on the Island is Kukuyu grass and each year it is attacked by a grass eating grub, I forget which, and grazing becomes very scarce. Hay is not made and all hard feeds are imported including chaffage or similar. No grains, e.g. oats or barley are allowed to be imported, it has all to be processed feed e.g. sweetfeed. On the plus side you can ride anywhere on public land including the National Park and land owners are quite helpful I understand. Heather and I both had a trip into the park and up to the highest peak and I also got out to the Cook Monument and had glorious coastal views. This was courtesy of a Pony Club Mum and greatly appreciated. The other ride we had was a commercial one under a pretty strict regime although a couple of times the competent ones were allowed to canter in certain places. I do not think we did much trotting, it was mainly walk. To the `city slicker' it was a great ride but with our wide open spaces and opportunities in New Zealand it was a little tame even with some coastal scenery and billy tea half way! The total land area of Norfolk Island is 3455 hectares, about one and a half times the size of Tawanui Station, on the Oruakukuru Road where the King Country Trek was held two years ago. It was a great holiday and if you ever go, do contact the Pony Club there you will be very welcome especially if you coincide with a rally date! Evelyn Cooper |
